Speaking about life satisfaction and happiness, Murray opines that there are three things which “lead people to reach old age satisfied with who they have been and what they have done”:įirst, the source of satisfaction involves something important. This discovery corresponds to a point made by sociologist Charles Murray in his 2012 book Coming Apart. “Yes, I suppose,” I said hesitantly, “but something that has depth and meaning.” “So… start something?” my young lunch partner inquired after I shared these thoughts.
That little initiative spawned deep discussions and openness about the nitty gritty aspects of life, and all of a sudden I realized what a wonderful group of friends I had. Seeking accountability, a group of us agreed to memorize Scripture passages, planning a fun activity to share in if we reached our goal. The thriving circle of confidantes I have today emerged from the difficult loss of a mutual loved one. Mulling it over, I slowly put my answer into words, explaining that I, too, went through a time without many friends. So desperate, that some companies are carving a niche for themselves as friend matchmakers, setting up fun meetings between people of similar backgrounds and interests in hopes that people “will fall for one another as BFFs.”Īdult women appear to be frequent fliers in BFF matchmaking services, making the question my young friend posed even more revealing. Loneliness is rampant, the article implies, and people are desperate for friends. This moment came back to me as I read a Washington Post article about the difficulty of making friends as an adult. It was time not only to find a job, but to make new friends and form new social structures. The high school friend group from four years before was the same story. Their close-knit group of college friends had been scattered to the wind. They were on their own for the first time, trying to make their way in the world. I suddenly realized the situation these girls were in. “Annie,” this young lady asked, “what did you do to make friends?” We were chatting away when one of them fired off a question that caught me by surprise. Late this summer I met with several recent college graduates for lunch.
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